First of all, as you've figured out by now (since that's pretty much what this blog has evolved to be about), I go to weddings alone because I'm single.
But, mostly, because Essence magazine told me to. :)
Their June issue (the one with J. Hud on the cover) sports the list, "10 Places to Meet Black Men" by Charreah Jackson and Niema Jordan. (Now, you know I folded down that page and read and reread it numerous times. Hey, I'll take all the advice I can get on this dating journey of mine.) Anyway, number 7 on the list says to "Witness a Wedding". It goes on to explain that when brothas see their male friends tying the knot, it sets off a sort of domino effect, causing them to look for wifey too. So, when one of my male friends invites me to his wedding, I go.
And I go prepared.
I plan the perfect outfit: a sexy new summer dress and strappy sandals. My hair is on point because I just got it done the week before, and my makeup is flawless...I'm rockin' the bronze, summery glow thing.
Now, before I go on any further, don't think I'm going to this wedding to meet my future husband. Of course, if it happens that way, I'd have absolutely NO complaints, but that isn't my mission. My mission is to help my friend celebrate his wedding day...and to meet at least one brotha with potential...gotta start slow. :)
The day of the wedding, which was last Saturday, I make sure to leave 45 minutes before the ceremony starts (I only live about 15 minutes away from the church). I want to get there early, grab a good seat, survey the scene...i.e. groomsmen and other unattached guests. As my luck would have it, however, the highway is shut down! Yes! I'm thinkin', damn! So, after my small freak-out/moment of being lost, I find the church and am escorted to my seat, which just so happens to be next to this cute guy who was indeed a friend of the groom.
I turn on my smile and talk to him for a few minutes before the ceremony starts. He seems receptive to me and we have a good conversation, laugh, joke, you know. I'm thinkin' I could leave with us exchanging numbers.
That doesn't happen.
So, I decide to sit by myself at the reception just so "cute ceremony guy", who in fact does have a name, Jaleel, would spot me from across the room and rescue me from my loneliness. We'd sit, chat, eat, laugh, and he'd be swept away by my charm.
That doesn't happen either.
After about 30 minutes of being the ONLY person in the ENTIRE room sitting alone, I start to feel a bit loserish. (Thank God some people join me soon after, and they're real cool.) Turns out, Jaleel, doesn't get there until right before the couple was announced and ends up sitting 3 tables up from me.
Ahhhh, but I don't give up. "He just got here too late", I say to myself. "I have to be proactive." So, I do several walk-bys...no reaction, that I could tell. And then, I even speak to him a couple of times.
Still nothing.
That's the second wedding I've been to this year. I've got two more this summer, but I already know they'll be fruitless (I love Black men and let's just say, I don't think there'll be very many of them at these next two.) At least I won't be going alone.
So much for the wedding thing.
The July issue of Essence just came a few days ago with yet another dating guide. I'm gonna give it another shot. I'm going to try out all of the tips and see if anything happens and document each thing as I try it. Stay tuned.
Do you have any tips on where to meet a good guy? Please comment and let us all know.
Wow you sound like me, granted I don't frequent Weddings but I do know the feeling of sitting in a room as the only single person, wishing that I was anywhere else. I hope things get better for you soon, and know that I would gladly escort you anywhere you wanted to go!
Posted by: SGT McClain | 06/19/2009 at 04:16 PM